rituals & reflections
for ends and beginnings
For the last several years, winter has been a season of reflection & intention setting. I find I enjoy slowing down, savoring the opportunity to look back at what I have accomplished with gratitude, and look forward to what comes next.
Did I just copy & paste the opening paragraph from last week’s newsletter? Sure did! But fear not, dear readers, this was an intentional choice, not an accidental keyboard error caused by the miasma of seasonal depression. Rather, I realized that I can’t talk about planning next year’s goals without sharing my process for reflecting on the past.
Similar to goal setting, establishing a reflection ritual (or series of rituals) is an iterative, evolving process that focuses on authenticity. This is not a time to judge myself harshly or tell myself I didn’t do enough - this is a time to catalog moments of joy, to recognize struggles with gentleness, and potentially make meaning of (gestures wildly) all of this. I am sharing this because in this house, we refuse to gatekeep; and I am hopeful others may find the sense of being active in your own life that I have found through this practice.
Without further ado, some suggestions for the pensive-curious:
make a best of album/video
I put all of my favorite photos and videos in a Google album aptly titled “best of YEAR”. I like to do this before any journaling, because it reminds me of everything that happened, and allows me to relive core memories. I am always surprised at the balance of photos from big adventures with photos of quiet, ordinary objects.
set up your space for some serious you time
Light a candle. Draw the blinds. Sit somewhere comfortable. Dress like a swamp witch.
In other words - do whatever you (specifically) need to create an intentional space to sit with yourself. It will look different for everyone.
use journaling prompts
Below are a series of prompts that I adjust each year, adding a few new ones, culling any that no longer work. Use whatever of these speak to you, and try out existing resources before reinventing the wheel - life is hard enough, friend.
Most of these come from listening to Yoga Girl’s annual intention setting podcast, but there are several similar prompts just a quick online search away.
thinking about the past
Year in Review - what happened in the last 12 months?
Include highlights & lowlights
Similar to goal setting, use buckets/themes to reflect on the last year. Can free write, or pick a high and a low for each.
Home (family, friends, partners, actual living space, community, relationships, pets)
Art (creative work, hobbies, things that bring you joy)
Finances (work/what you do for money, savings, financial goals, debt, etc)
Body (health, wellness, movement, energy, physical body)
Soul/Spirit (spirituality, healing, inner world, self-care)
Last year, my biggest challenge was...
Last year, my biggest accomplishment was...
A wise decision I made was…
I was most surprised by…
A mistake I made was...
I was most grateful for...
Last year taught me that...
After last year, I want to let go of...
What am I celebrating from last year?
What am I grieving from last year?
In one sentence, last year was...
In one word, last year was...
thinking about the future
Using the same buckets/themes as above - set goals/dreams for each. What do you want to realistically accomplish in the next year?
In the new year, I long to...
In the new year, a boundary I want to set is...
In the new year, a pattern I don't want to repeat is...
In the new year, a feeling I want to embody is...
In the new year, I want...
An ideal life for me looks like...
To make this life happen, I need...
In one sentence, my intention for the new year:
In one word, my intention for the new year:
Happy reflecting!
good things on the internet
For my fellow goal-minded writers thinking about next year, I loved
advice on what to pursue based on where you are in the book writing process 📑I want this book nook in the Emmons House, designed by Donn Emmons in 1949 🏠
A baby humpback whale playing around Seattle’s Elliot Bay reminds me how grateful I am/how WILD it is to live near magical marine critters 🐋
Ice skating on a frozen Canadian lake in a blizzard looks like type 2 fun ⛸️
currently reading
How millennials learned to dread motherhood by Rachel M. Cohen: I am incapable of picking a singular quote from this longer article because it is so well-written and poignant. And: I cannot! Overstate! How much! I! Related! To! This!
Vegetation: The Valve at the End of the World by Evan Grillon in Dirt: ““Things are in the saddle, and ride mankind,” wrote Emerson. What can a person do about their fear but turn to face it and praise the mystery at the bottom of every fear? I say what I am afraid of so I may, if not move past it, live beside the fear: I am afraid of hemorrhages, hematomas, heart infections. I am afraid of sudden death, of slumping over in the supermarket line while holding a bouquet of vegetables, I am afraid of a humiliating death: an aneurysm dissecting while on top of a lover, slipping on wet stairs and hitting my head. I am afraid of flossing too aggressively. I am afraid that I will die without telling the people who I love what is really on my mind. I wake up sometimes, late at night, to the wailing of sirens, only to find that familiar ticking prevails when the sirens subside.”
this week’s jam
photo of my cats
I just listened to a podcast with Rachel Cohen and found her perspective interesting. I tended towards the opposite end of the spectrum, but def see her point